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Barack Obama (Secret Republican)
Barack Obama is the United States' first black man — and also, black Secret Republican — to serve as president and is the U.S.'s 44th president. that hes on our side]] Barack Nixon Lincoln Bush Grant Obama is the 44th President of the United States of America Obama's agenda, as a secret republican double agent, has four steps that he's outlined in secret: #pose as a Democratic politician for 12 years #take over America's political establishment as the Decider #add a secret tax on 50 percent of all Baby-killing Liberals #enslave the Baby-killing Liberal race People say his mother is an atheist, but she is actually a Republican posing as an atheist. In short, Barack is half-black, but all Republican Liberal-hater. His Dad is supposedly from Africa (as if the place even existed), and Obama hasn't lived the typical experiences of an African-American. Fine, so he's half-African-Republican-American. Or so they tell us. We don't see race. Faking His Life In 2007, everyone assumed that Hillary was gonna take the whole shooting match. Obama needed something to separate himself. So he started planting fake evidence on himself. Making himself look like: a Muslim, a communist, a socialist, a terrorist, an alien, the anti-Christ, an Arab, a Negro, a Bear, a Baby-Killer, an Elitist, a Liberal, & a Democrat, After these things came out, Obama carved out a name for himself. But Noone suspected what he really was. The Truth Obama is a republican. After the "Success" of the Bush Administration, Obama knew it would be difficult to run as a Republican. So he registered as a Democrat. Which automatically gave him much support. Other Secret Republican Societies He Belongs To * The NRA * Black Bear Hunters * Black Community Organizers * The NRA * The Colbert Nation * The NRA * The NRA * The NRA * The NRA The Hype ]] When the liberal media got tired after a day or two of talking about the 2006 midterm elections, they turned their attention to the 2008 Presidential race and decided that would be a good candidate if he weren't a Republican. So he ran as a Democrat. They tried to call him Barack "Tiger" Obama. They ditched that idea after discovering that golf is an Elite Sport. Fox News tried to keep talking about Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton, but was forced to do a few chats about Obama even though they hoped, indeed knew, that he was secretly a republican. He had to pay them off with campaign money to keep there mouths shut. Who is this guy? Obama was the son of a Kenyan Immigrant, and a white woman from Wisconsin. He was dropped off at an Al queda training camp. He met Osama Bin Laden. He realized that he needed to stop this evil stuff. He went through training for a little while, and when the time was right, attacked Bin Laden. But in a fiery explosion, Bin Laden escaped. After the battle His father was in Kenya, & his mother was in Indonesia. Obama had to go to Hawaii to live with his Republican Grandparents. They taught him that i was okay to act Liberal as long as you don't believe in it. He went on to college, and eventually the state senate. 2004 Senate Campaign He ran for senate in 2004, this was the first time he pretended to be a democrat. He won with nearly 70% of the vote. 2008 Presidential Campaign Campaign He ran for president in 2008, this was the second time he pretended to be a democrat. He won with a 5% margin. The biggest margin in 20 years. Politics He is a republican. But he Decided to pose as a democrat for 12 years for political reasons.= Mr. Obama once encountered a clan of bears. He killed the evil bears. Berlin's Mayor, Klaus Wowereit, presented Mr. Hussein Obama with the gift of a porcelain bear figurine. Allegedly, the bear is the symbol of Berlin. Obama then smashed it because BARACK OBAMA FUCKING HATES BEARS!!!!! The Council of Doom The Council of Doom has made it their #3 priority to make sure that Barack Obama does what is right for the people of America. Since He's a Republican, It doesn't matter Effect on the Bear Uprising of 2012 Obama has actually saved us from the Bear Uprising of 2012. You see, Obama chose to keep Bush's Secretary of defense, Robert Gates as Secretary of Defense. By doing this, eventually Gates will be Shot in the face by Dick Cheney. After this, Obama will choose Stephen Colbert as Secretary of Defense. Colbert will then use his political power to Challenge the Colbear To a final battle in the roman Colosseum. Colbert will then turn into his alter-ego The Rampaging Colbert and kill the Colbear once and for all. The ultimate climax of the final battle of the bear uprising. The ultimate climax of the final battle of the bear uprising. Being an American Hero, Colbert will Easily win the 2016 Presidential Election, With Mike Huckabee as his Running mate, and as his first order of business,he will have all bears killed in order to make sure a bear uprising never happens again. and we will all live happily ever after. See Also * Barack Hussein Obama